In the Dawn Light

Wake up before the sun
Paint the sky with clouds
Sail through light, through shade, through shadow, through mutating colors
Dance in the dawn’s friscalating sunrise
Wander aimlessly through shreds of your own memories, your own dreams, your own fantasies, the water below you a colored mirror of cloud, pandemonium on its lips, spectrums of chaos racing across its palate
You woke in an abrasion of morning anxiety, then sat in the back of the car and waited for it to disseminate into the sobriety of a midday spent waiting, waiting, waiting for the night to begin
Finally signaling and end to the relentless monotony of office life, of rote tasks meaninglessly executed
And all the petty fears, the petty annoyances, the hates, the burns, the frustrations, the stupid meaningless words and empty gestures that tie together this dollhouse, poorly stitched, in which we all play our roles,
Here we are again, watching the advertisements and secretly, unconsciously wishing we were them, that we had those retarded jobs, that we could take on those stupid roles at least once, just for a moment, and live that flesh fantasy
Like anything could actually approach the sexiness of a Hollywood projection
No, we will go on
We will thrash forward with something that bears resemblance to cold grey steel and concrete
Worn wood and leather, cold machines, working without wifi connections
No longer directed by the mother ship
No longer in communicado with our source
Cheap pants and shirts, discount jackets, jeans, ties, knit hats, cheap suits, scarves, 15% off MUNI rides, armpit hair, coffee breath, 2 for 1 dinner specials, frozen pizza, Netflix, Facebook
What more is a life composed of than these mundanities?
What more can we lay claim to—the things we fuel and cloth ourselves with, the tickets we buy and pin on our jackets
Our coat checks, our baggage claims, our incense carriers.
What more? What more? What more?
If the sun is bothering you, just let me know. Just let me know.

34

cowards work for gold
when they have no heart in it
how do the brave eat? 

We Need Towels, Gently

I wanna try to be a young mom, she said
Recycled plastic bag worn thin at the knees
Bursting dead glass and toe-up cans
A concrete pigeon with two missing toes pecking at
Greasy pizza face smile
Restrooms out of order due to vandalism
A silver dread smiles shyly
Wanna buy half of two dollars?
Come try our melted european cafe kick tire sale
Come try our trusty wednesdays
Come try our famous hour
Handshake club, members only
We need towels, gently
Used men's t-shirts
and pants

74

stringy, spare trees
storm clouds harshing my buzz
spare some change, bro? 

712

I am a bubble floating in the middle of a fathomless ocean
I am the mist blown from the crest of a crashing wave
I am a single rain drop hurtling through a limtless sky
Falling through time
Separate but for a moment
Waiting for

For the Living

Dedicated to those we lost in 2012, especially Margaret Otchy, Chris Schorb, Jeff Lunger, and Adrian Pooley.

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For the Living

When you are sad and alone
Think of me
When you are frustrated by the world
Think of me
When you know that you are right, and that there is injustice that seems insurmountable
Think of me
When you are tired and weary and disgusted by your lot
Think of me
When the day is beginning, and you know it will be a struggle the whole way through
Think of me
When the day is drawing to a close, and you feel like you have achieved nothing other than driving yourself out of your mind
Think of me
When you think you have nothing left to give, and the world is unfair, and you have seen the worst of it
Think of me
When you think no one cares, when you are convinced there is no meaning
Think of me
When you don't think you have the heart to see another day, and there's nothing but pain before you
Know that I was there once, too
When there's nothing left but rinds and crumbs in the pantry, and a whole family waiting to eat
Think of me
When you think you've given it all you had, and still it is not enough
Think of me
I've been there, and I assure you, you are not alone
I am with you
How could I abandon you, my child, my brother, my sister, my kin,
My father, my mother, my lover, my friend?
You need only think of me, and I will be there
Where else could I be but in the presence of those I loved so dearly?
And will continue to love
Until we meet again

A Cat in the Hall

I’m not a boy who goes to the mall
I’m just a little cat who hangs out in the hall
My ears may be brown and my head’s kind of small
But I’m still just a cat who hangs out in the hall.

My tail is made of rabbit fur, hay, and old shoes
When I play Uncle Wiggily, I never lose
My cousin likes to stay up late at night and sing the blues
But when she does, I don’t stay there ‘cuz I’ll drink up all the booze.

To eat, I have to beg; sometimes I have to steal
But I never went a day without eating every meal.
No one ever blamed me for having too much sex appeal.
I don’t know many people, and those I know, they aren’t real.

Imaginary friends, I guess, are just my lot
They never ask to borrow money, and they never smoke my pot
I dance around from here to there, and talk to my robot
Oh look now, here he comes. Let me introduce you lot.

Robbie, this is Buttons; Buttons this is Rob.
You can call him Robert, or you can call him Bob.
Don’t expect him to be chatty—today he’s on the job.
Oh Rob, wait a second, don’t get all angry, we just wanted to ask you a few questions!

So that’s the long and short of it, I guess I’ll leave you all
There are hallways to be walked in and problems to be solved
I would give you my number, but I know you’ll never call
The loneliest cat to ever walk in the hall.



(I stole the pic from Patti Haskins)